


Dear Louis

by emmablackery



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: I'm Sorry, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Self-Harming Harry, and this happened in like 20 minutes, dont judge me pls, i was sad, mentions of self harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-03
Updated: 2014-01-03
Packaged: 2018-01-07 06:37:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1116661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmablackery/pseuds/emmablackery
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry's letters to Louis after that one fateful night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dear Louis

Dear Louis, 

You can't be gone. You just can't be. I got the call you were in the hospital because you jumped off that damned bridge. The doctors said you weren't expected to last through the night. I sat down and cried because the last thing I said to you was, "I hate you,". How can a person deal with themselves knowing that's the last thing they heard from you? I was by your side when the line went flat and the eerie beep rang thoughout the room. Telling everyone you were ripped from life. I should've been there to stop you. I should've been there to pull you down and kiss you hard on the lips and tell you I love you. But I can't rewind time and change the past, now can I, Louis?

Love, Harry.

 

Dear Louis, 

It's been a month since you've been gone. All the boys are coming by to make sure I'm okay. Honestly, Louis- I'm not. I don't think I will ever be okay again. At least, not without you here. They're all worried about me. I'd be worried about me too, if I'm being honest. I want something to release all of the damn  _guilt_ I'm feeling. Right now; this razor is becoming my closest friend. It's always there to relieve the pain I feel. Don't be too disappointed in me, Lou.

Yours, Harry.

 

Dear Louis,

God damn it Louis! Why the fuck did you have to leave?! Why did you jump off that fucking bridge?! Why wouldn't you let me try to help you instead of jumping?! Why did you have to fucking relapse and be so close to the fucking edge?! Why was I your string of life that got cut as soon as those words?! Why was I so fucking stupid to not see the fucking warning signs?! Why did depression have to happen to you?! Why did you leave me, Louis? Why..

Sorry for being so angry, Harry. 

 

Dear Louis,

Nothing is helping anymore. The razors aren't giving me the release I used to feel. The release I need. I've turned to alcohol instead. It's always bitter and burning down my throat but it gives me nights to where I can have one night of no memory of you. No pain. No guilt. No  _anything_. Please don't be too angry with me, please.

I'm sorry, Harry. 

 

Dear Louis,

I'm going mad. It's been a year that you've been gone and I'm finally done with life. I haven't had human contact in two months. I can't do anything with myself. Not without you here. Everybody is forgetting about you, but I just can't. I can't live without you- can't function. So, Louis, this will be the last letter I will write to you. I'm giving up to be with you. I'm sorry. I love you.

With Love, Harry.

xxx

 

Harry folded the letter and put it in a keepsake box and locked it. He put the box under his bed and went to his dresser. Harry pulled out his top drawer, in his right hand, a bottle of pills. In his left, a bottle of Jack Daniels. Harry smiled and sat down on the floor. "Here I come, Louis." Harry said, swallowing all the pills and taking a huge swig of the alcohol. Harry felt his soul lift from his body and he was in a place where sad, blue eyes stared into his. 

"Louis," Harry breathed. 


End file.
